{scraps of things from the pocket of an old coat}

Friday, April 8, 2011

Wednesdays and Thursdays have become non-days -- my shifts have changed and now i have two full days of work instead of one full and two halves. ironically, it's to my financial advantage -- just as everyone else is feeling the pinch of their schedule. which also makes me feel a bit uncomfortable, despite it being a decision beyond my control.

they've become days of utter disconnection -- i feel all adrift, out of my daily rhythms which makes me realize how important they've become. those simple rituals that mark the passing of our day. instead, i get home from work and the kitchen is in various states of disarray, the cats need feeding, the dogs want walking and everyone is clamoring to tell me of their day. i feel like there's not enough of me to go around. which makes me anxious and grumpy.

i wonder if this is my fear of maternal failure being poked, my low tolerance for "overwhelmedness", or simply the fact that it didn't occur to anyone to wash the fucking dishes.

ps. i've turned off the comments...it's just better that way. xo

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